I've wanted to capture some of my experiences working retail for ages now. I spent 4 years in Sears (I was in college, okay?), and had some weird experiences. Anyone who's worked retail that long will probably know what I'm talking about.

So anyway, this incident actually happened pretty late during my sears career, towards the end of my third year I believe. I was still at this point a TV/Audio salesman, but during the holidays, I'd often have to cover in computers. Especially during the weeknights, when we'd stay open until 11, and all the high school kids had to go home because they had school the next day. Like any of them really went to school, bastards.

One thing that always amazed me was the ability of some people to never be happy with a price. We had something cheaper than CompUSA? Great, but can you take an extra $50 off. My tie didn't match my shirt/pants? That's another $25. Okay, I made that last one up, but people were tenacious about saving.

So anyway, about 10:40 one night, I'm hanging out with my friend in vacs. All I can think about at that point is getting the hell out of there, and driving back to school to hang out with some girl. So we're bullshitting, and some guy and his daughter stroll in and start looking at a Compaq (actually, it was a 166mhz compaq with 32MB of ram. Good shit for the day).

So I walk over, and he starts jabbering away about how much his daughter wants one, and really could use one, 'cos it's so important in schools these days. And really, without one, he'd just be holding her back.

Then he says to me, "But I'll wait. It'll be cheaper in a few months". I just nod, figuring he's right, and a few months isn't really going to hurt this girl's adacemic career.

But the guy has to take it a step further. He goes on to tell me he never pays full price for anything.

This irritates me. I pride myself on being able to send guys like this home shaking, after having paid full price. I don't mind bending a little if the person has a legitimate reason, but if they're trying to get a few bucks off just for the sake of getting a few bucks off, it ain't gonna happen. Not on my shift, at least, asshole.

So I just look at him, and reply, "Oh yeah?"

He says, "Yeah. Just last week, my daughter and I got all dressed up. Bundled up real good. Then we drove out to the tree lot, and had the kid there follow us around while we looked at trees. He wasn't wearin much, and it was cold. They said trees were $20, but after makin him walk around the lot with us for 40 minutes, I got him to sell us one at $16. You shoulda seen him, his nose was running, face was red, I thought he was gonna cry."

So I have thoughts of this poor kid getting sick. All he really wants to do is his job, and do a good job at that. He doesn't want to have to sell a guy a tree for less, he may even have to pay the difference. He probably doesn't want to get in trouble. At some point he probably figured it was better to just pay the $4 for the guy than mortgage his future health, and the kid probably didn't make much more than the $4 and hour to begin with.

The guy obviously doesn't think so deeply about this, he doesn't see the human suffering behind his desire to save $4. So this pisses me off. So I reply back, "And you're proud of this?"

I was told later by my friend that he looked confused for a second. Like he knew I was basically calling him an asshole in a very roundabout way. His face distorted a few times, I'm sure thoughts of compassion and shame may have entered in there, but they quickly faded. I was told he looked like he wanted to punch me.

But all of that faded fast. He looked at me and said "You're damn right! I Saved $4!" Swear to god.